Quentin: And we’re back.
Jason: We took a week off.
Jake: It was my fault. I couldn’t see another Dwayne Johnson film. Not to offend any of his fans, but it just wasn’t in me.
Quentin: I think the time off was good. We got non-stop films now that summer has officially begun in movie land.
Jake: We went to see Iron Man 3 today.
Jason: It was good. Not great, but good.
Jake: The Rotten Tomatoes score of 77% is very accurate.
Quentin: I agree. 77% of the time it’s showing us something that’s clearly not the first draft. That was the biggest problem with G.I Joe. Clearly a first draft script.
Jake: Among so many other sins.
Jason: Let’s talk about Downey.
Quentin: An icon. How can anyone say otherwise? He’s a great actor and a good enough movie star to pull Tony Stark off. Even though, full disclosure, I hated the second one.
Jake: You actually fell asleep? What’s that about with you? I’ve never fallen asleep during a movie.
Quentin: I don’t know what it is. Boredom equals a nap in my world.
Jason: Didn’t you think the entire second act of Iron Man 2 was totally nap worthy?
Jake: No, I liked it.
Quentin: We will have to disagree on that one, McAlister. For the record, though, I’m shocked. You must have been in an unusually good mood that day, because that is not a good movie.
Jake: Did you like this one better?
Quentin: Much. I’m still not an Iron Man junkie, even though I want his touch screen interface. I think I’m going to like Man of Steel better. Just because I like Superman better.
Jake: So you think of Iron Man as a minor superhero?
Quentin: Yeah, I guess so. I actually liked this better than The Avengers. There was something about that movie that was…
Quentin: Yeah. Look, clearly I’m in the minority here. This movie has already been hugely successful overseas, which I only know because you’re always tweeting the box office reports.
Jake: You don’t like those tweets?
Quentin: I didn’t say that. Don’t get so defensive. Not everything that comes out of my mouth is meant to be snarky.
Jason: Since when?
Quentin: Shut up, little brother. I’ve had it with you.
Jason: Had it? I’m just getting started.
Jake: Highlights of this film?
Quentin: The appropriate use of an adorable kid.
Jason: I liked the whole surrogate father/son dynamic.
Jake: I thought it was more big brother/little brother.
Quentin: Either way, it worked. Largely because of a strong script and, hey, you got Downey playing Tony Stark. That combination has a lot of miles.
Jason: Despite the ending, this is clearly not the last of the franchise.
Jake: Should it be?
Quentin: Yes and no. If Downey was smart, he would hang up the suit now. Take a few years off and then reboot with another actor. Let Downey play Stark in The Avengers sequel, and then that should be it. Enough already. He’s going to run this character into the ground and become a caricature of himself in the process.
Jake: I don’t know what you’re talking about. It’s a business. You don’t leave money on the table.
Quentin: Are you looking forward to Fast and Furious 6?
Jake: No. I’m lobbying hard to see Hangover 3 that weekend.
Quentin: Six is too many of anything. Even as it is, I think there’s only one movie in the next two months that isn’t a sequel, a remake, or a reboot.
Jason: We need to see more art films.
Jake: Let’s face it. We see the big tent-pole movies because they get the most pageviews.
Quentin: Jesus, we’re already a victim of our own greed.
Jason: Then we should look for something other than Fast and Furious 6 or Hangover 3. Even if it only gets 20 hits.
Quentin: We have a new most popular of all time, don’t we Jake?
Jake: Yes. Our review of Olympus Has Fallen flew past Django Unchained a couple of weeks ago. It’s our first post to reach 300 page views.
Quentin: That is so sweet. 300 people give enough of a shit to read our thoughts on a movie. That’s pretty cool. We should thank everyone for reading. We know they’re out there.
Jason: It is cool, I admit.
Jake: Thank you to everyone who stops by and reads. It means a lot to us.
Quentin: Speaking of reading, have you finished Gatsby yet?
Jason: I have.
Jake: I’m halfway through.
Quentin: I’m at 69%.
Jason: You are not. You just like to say 69.
Quentin: “69, dude!”
Jake: This roundtable has gone horribly off course.
Quentin: Pull my finger.
Jason: Stop, now.
Quentin: Sorry, I can’t help myself. It’s my ADHD.
Jake: Let’s cover the other actors. Paltrow?
Quentin: Okay until the end. Then she became annoying.
Jason: I agree.
Jake: Ben Kingsley?
Jason: Loved him. I appreciated the twist halfway through the movie. Not everyone’s going to like it, but I thought it worked because of Ben Kingsley.
Jake: Guy Pearce?
Quentin: Wasted. He didn’t bring anything new or interesting to the table.
Jake: Ouch. I didn’t think he was that bad.
Quentin: I didn’t say he was bad. He was satisfactory.
Jason: That’s worse.
Quentin: Exactly. The movie swallowed him up. He should stick to indies.
Jake: Favorite sequence?
Quentin: Where they fall out of the plane and link up.
Jason: Barrel of Monkeys.
Jason: I liked the stuff with the kid. Dry, funny, void of sentimentality and cheese. I like that he spends more time out of the suit than in it.
Jake: I appreciated the movie’s sense of humor.
Quentin: It’s trying. You know I’m thrilled by a high degree of effort. Like romance novels, comic book movies are riddled with clichés. So what’s the fresh take? What’s the spin? No one takes anything for granted here. I think Shane Black did a better job than Favraeu, just in terms of cohesive narrative. The second one was a mess.
Jason: You’re repeating yourself.
Quentin: Some things are worth repeating.
Jake: Definitely stick around through the credits.
Jason: That was funny. After a movie, the three of us usually sit there for five minutes on our phones. Most of the time, we look up and the theater is empty. Today, half the people were still there, and I was like, “Oh, yeah, this is a Marvel movie. There’s going to be a scene after the credits.”
Jake: We won’t give it away.
Quentin: Speak for yourself. It’s…
Jason: <slaps his hand over Quentin’s mouth> Make sure to stop by next week for our review of The Great Gatsby.
Jason: Shhhh. If Iron Man is in your wheelhouse, you won’t want to miss this installment.
Jake: Keep your hand there. I like him this way.